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第四講 巧妙遣詞造句，實(shí)現(xiàn)升級(jí)策略,(2014·高考新課標(biāo)全國(guó)卷Ⅱ)一家英語(yǔ)報(bào)社向中學(xué)生征文,主題是“十年后的我”。請(qǐng)根據(jù)下列要點(diǎn)和你的暢想完成短文。 1．家庭； 2．工作； 3．業(yè)余生活。 注意：1.詞數(shù)100左右； 2．可以適當(dāng)增加細(xì)節(jié)，以使行文連貫； 3．開(kāi)頭語(yǔ)已為你寫(xiě)好。 I often imagine what my life will be like in the future. _____________________________________________________,滿分作文： _______________________________________________would like to give an excellent picture of my future life(很好地描繪我未來(lái)的生活) in ten years.To begin with(首先)，I will make every effort to take good care of my family，especially my aged grandfather because he has _________________________________________________①(奉獻(xiàn)大部分生活養(yǎng)育兩代人)．_________work is concerned (就工作而言)，I am determined to become a film - maker②____________ (那種情況下)，I shall direct many good movies for the audience.During holiday seasons，I will live in the,I often imagine what my life will be like in the future.,devoted most of his life to bringing up two generations,As far as,In that case,countryside，_________________________________________③(在那里空氣新鮮，人們友善)．I will enjoy so many interesting activities，____________ (例如) fishing, swimming and visiting old friends. Such will be my future life，one I have been _____________ ④(夢(mèng)想)．,where air is fresh and people are friendly,such as,dreaming of,溫馨提示1.巧用詞匯，give an excellent picture of，to begin with，devote.to；bring up；As far as work is concerned，in that case；such as；dream of 2．①該句是一個(gè)含原因狀語(yǔ)從句的復(fù)合句，邏輯嚴(yán)密，用詞準(zhǔn)確，語(yǔ)義連貫。 ②As far as work.is concerned的運(yùn)用使句子緊湊。 ③定語(yǔ)從句的使用，符合評(píng)分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)對(duì)復(fù)雜句式的要求。 ④倒裝句和定語(yǔ)從句巧妙結(jié)合，與首句相呼應(yīng)，體現(xiàn)了語(yǔ)篇的完整性。,一、遣詞方面： 1．措辭要貼切具體 試比較下面句子：一個(gè)人正在街上閑逛。 A man is walking down the street. A man is wandering down the street. 通過(guò)比較可以看出，前一句不如后一句表達(dá)得具體、生動(dòng)。一個(gè)詞如果內(nèi)涵越具體，那么在特定的場(chǎng)景中恰當(dāng)?shù)厥褂盟?就會(huì)收到意想不到的效果。,2．要善于運(yùn)用短語(yǔ) 短語(yǔ)用得好，會(huì)給評(píng)卷老師留下深刻印象。例如： When he was a child，he wanted to learn everything.(普通) When he was a child，he had a strong appetite(胃口)for knowledge.(高級(jí)) 二、造句方面： 1．巧用非謂語(yǔ)動(dòng)詞 運(yùn)用非謂語(yǔ)動(dòng)詞，可使文句看起來(lái)更簡(jiǎn)潔，使語(yǔ)言更加豐富多彩，重點(diǎn)更加突出，增加文采。 I covered my ears，trying to keep the noise out，but failed.,2．巧用with復(fù)合結(jié)構(gòu) “with＋名詞/代詞＋現(xiàn)在分詞/過(guò)去分詞/形容詞/副詞/介詞”結(jié)構(gòu)，常作伴隨狀語(yǔ)以增加被描繪內(nèi)容的生動(dòng)性和情感性，使文章讀起來(lái)更簡(jiǎn)潔明了。試比較： He slept all the night and the window was open.(一般) He slept all the night with the window open.(高級(jí)),3．巧用復(fù)合句 評(píng)分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)中強(qiáng)調(diào)使用語(yǔ)法結(jié)構(gòu)的數(shù)量和復(fù)雜性，鼓勵(lì)考生盡量使用較復(fù)雜的結(jié)構(gòu)，并且對(duì)由此產(chǎn)生的錯(cuò)誤采取了寬容的態(tài)度。如果恰當(dāng)運(yùn)用各類(lèi)從句，就會(huì)增加文章的亮點(diǎn)。 Soon I became one of the top students in my class，which greatly increased my confidence and got me motivated.(定語(yǔ)從句),4．巧用倒裝句、感嘆句、強(qiáng)調(diào)句、虛擬語(yǔ)氣句等 使用這些句式可使文章化平淡為生動(dòng)，加強(qiáng)語(yǔ)氣，使評(píng)卷老師感受作者的強(qiáng)烈情感，起到升級(jí)文章的作用。 Disappointed as I felt at the shabby campus and the poorly equipped classroom，I found the teachers patient and considerate.(倒裝句),5．巧用排比等句式 如能運(yùn)用一個(gè)個(gè)排比句、對(duì)偶句、不定式或短語(yǔ)，可使文章增色不少，會(huì)給評(píng)卷老師眼前一亮的感覺(jué)。 The purpose of the program is to make our school more beautiful，to make the air cleaner and fresher，and to turn our school into a better place for us to study and live in.,亮點(diǎn)詞句： _________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________,full of warmth，love and laughter；show concern for；If；is more likely to be；Otherwise；Meanwhile；are sure to；Since；plays a very important role in；it is up to；contribute to；First of all；pay more attention to；Besides；communicate with；As；If we do so,Ⅱ.巧用遣詞造句，升級(jí)下面文章 留意一下我們的周邊，可以發(fā)現(xiàn)陪讀現(xiàn)象很普遍。請(qǐng)你根據(jù)以下要點(diǎn)寫(xiě)一篇短文，內(nèi)容應(yīng)包括： 1．簡(jiǎn)要描述陪讀現(xiàn)象； 2．分析父母陪讀的原因(2至3個(gè))； 3．發(fā)表你對(duì)此的看法。 注意：1.詞數(shù)：120～150； 2．標(biāo)題已給出，不計(jì)入總詞數(shù)。,Should Our Parents Accompany Us in Studying at School _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________,In recent years，many parents choose to accompany their children in studying，which has aroused a wide concern. These parents are willing to leave their hometown，even quit their jobs to follow their children into the campus.Most of them rent an apartment nearby so as to take good care of their children.,_____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________,Parents consider it necessary to offer a better living condition to their children.Meanwhile，it enables them to keep track of their children’s academic performance. Nevertheless，what they have ignored is that it will get their kids into the habit of being dependent.Thus，they will never develop the ability of self-control in the future. Trust leads to independence.So it seems to me parents should create room for children’s growth and study in order to ensure their overall development.,